Today, I used the second stick of the second kit and came back same as the other 3's negative. I know that I maybe going through menopause stage but this is not how I should be celebrating..huhuhu.. I am nervous that I maybe pregnant. With 4 test done already, all are negative I should not be worry.
I called in to see a doctor this morning and receptionist did not write my call back number properly. I was waiting all day to get a phone call from my doctor, didn't happen. I had to call her back 10 minutes before they close just to make sure if I had given her the right number and she said " no, you didn't give me the right number to call you back." !! I was shaking and didn't know what to say to her other than saying yes to her saying that I have to call back again tomorrow to do the same thing over again.. WTS!! I said to husband. So he got on the phone and called the doctor's office and spoke to the receptionist. He told me that she didn't write my number down at all..again, WTS.!!! I waited all day here and couldn't think of running because I want to know if I will be carrying another life!!..I'm so stressed out.
I thought that if I write my feelings down this will help me get through my day. And for real, I really hope so. Husband is gone and running while I'm whining down my misery.
My head spins like roller coaster in Knotts.
- I gain at least 3lbs for the last two months.
- I have maintained my diet so what's up with the 3 lbs. I have my numbers where I want them to be so I better watch it like 24/7... yes, because I can.
- Been exercising like I always have, and that's why I can't understand why my weight is up..
- Yes, the last month I had my period was in 3rd of June and lasted for 7 days and very light. that means I have not have my period for two months now.
- Experiencing hot flashes..
PS..
Dear mother in law, we missed you so dearly. It had been 11 days since you have gone . We always talk about you of how nice you were to us ans how much happiness you brought to your siblings. I remember you coming down the escalator of LAX by yourself and was so happy to hugged you. You we're so excited to see Los Angeles, where your only baby made it A HOME for him and his new family. You were so excited to hold your only grandson. You came to his birthday party we had for him at his school and he was so proud telling his friends that you are his grandma.
You always sent us many boxes from the retailer in Christiansburg, full of clothing for all of us here. You never missed sending us birthday cards, and other special occasions. You always gave Matt the toys he wants and games he wants. And some extra love cash or cards for geraldine. Even when she's not living with us, you always made sure she's not left out by your love. You were such an extra loving person.
Herb and I were so happy that you and my mother came together to be with us in our home here in Los Angeles. We were so proud of you and mother too. This really was a real treat for me and herb since both our mother's came together. I remember having our first dinner in my backyard with little flowers I was able to plant. We had salad, rice, soy sauce, fish soup and some soft drinks. Oh so many good memories we were able to share.
Our trip together with my own mother to Las Vegas was really a highlight of the meeting. We walked miles and miles and only me that complaint..that's no joke.
We will visit you when we come there to see dad this thanksgiving week. I hope all is well with you and the friends you may have found and many families too..
love you.. from all of us here..
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